What Truly Drives Our Decisions As Leaders?
We might like to think it’s a blend of logic, experience, and insight, but neuroscience suggests there’s more to the story. Beneath the surface, our minds are often guided by subconscious “algorithms” set long ago—patterns of thinking built from past experiences, cultural expectations, and even childhood lessons. These deeply ingrained beliefs can sometimes become invisible forces shaping the way we lead, for better or worse.
Imagine this: You find yourself holding back in a meeting, obsessing over perfecting every detail, or delaying a decision because it’s just not “right” yet. Often, these habits are the result of reinforcement from years ago. If, for example, we learned early on that “good enough” wasn’t good enough, we may now unconsciously associate self-worth with perfection. It’s the brain’s way of protecting an identity that once served us well. But left unchecked, these old scripts can limit us, keeping us in the “low road” of reaction and self-preservation.
Cultivating the “High Road” and Meeting Your Wise Advocate
The good news is, we have the capacity to rewrite these old patterns. Neuroscience calls this self-directed neuroplasticity: the brain’s ability to change by consistently choosing new, constructive responses. Through mindfulness and intentional reflection, leaders can access what’s known as the “high road” — a state of broader thinking, empathy, and strategic vision.
On this high road, we tap into what Jeffrey Schwartz, Josie Thomson, and Art Kleiner refer to as the “Wise Advocate.” Think of this as an inner guide, a voice that’s able to look at the bigger picture and make decisions grounded in purpose, not reaction. By developing this Wise Advocate, we can see beyond our past conditioning, making choices that lead to long-term impact and growth.
Practical Ways to Access the High Road
How do we bring this Wise Advocate into our daily leadership? Here are a few powerful, practical steps:
Practice Daily Mindfulness
Start with a few minutes a day to observe your thoughts without judgment. This simple exercise helps us develop the awareness to pause, especially in high-stress moments, and shifts us away from reactive thinking.- Identify Old Patterns
Reflect on the question: What beliefs am I holding onto for validation or security? This process of naming our old patterns is often eye-opening and helps us identify triggers that may be steering us in unhelpful directions. - Consult Your Wise Advocate
Imagine seeking guidance from a trusted advisor who always sees the bigger picture. What would they say about the situation you’re facing? This mental exercise can help reframe challenges, inviting objectivity and wisdom into our choices. - Tune into the “Chatter”
Notice your inner dialogue. What is it telling you? What’s the hidden belief behind it? Identifying and reframing these thoughts is crucial in reprogramming our mental scripts, allowing us to step out of past limitations and into possibility. - Practice Empathy with Mentalizing
Before important conversations, consider others’ perspectives. What are they likely thinking or feeling? This shift in focus not only builds connection but also strengthens your ability to make decisions that are strategic and inclusive.
Leading With Self-Awareness
Our past experiences may shape us, but they don’t have to control us. By listening to our inner Wise Advocate and reflecting on our inner “chatter,” we can break free from patterns that no longer serve us, allowing us to lead with purpose and clarity. When we embrace the high road in leadership, we move beyond patterns of protection and limitation, empowering ourselves and our teams to reach new heights.
Are you ready to break free from old scripts and lead with a adaptive, inspired and generative perspective?
Written by:
Jessica Choo, Founder & Chief Strategist of ILS
With over 30 years of consulting and operational experience, Jessica is a highly esteemed strategist in performance, talent, and organisational development. Her expertise spans change management and strategic leadership development, where she has successfully guided over 15,000 executives across more than 200 projects in 20 countries. Jessica employs a behavioural science approach to foster culture and people development, achieving remarkable outcomes in organisational performance and culture change initiatives. As a professional coach, she empowers senior leaders to think clearly, lead confidently, and commit to impactful actions. Furthermore, her collaboration with the Growth Mindset Institute in crafting innovative solutions has positioned her as a trailblazer in the field of sustainable organisational change.
